Dating…Not a Science

Dating, there’s no rule book or quick reference guide to successfully landing the ideal mate. For men and women, the stress over the pains of building meaningful relationships is too real. I couldn’t help but notice a perceived uptick in the number of dating experiences gone awry by my friends and associates. Far be it from me to be a relationship and dating expert because I have to say I won the lottery in that department after a life of playing Russian roulette. Yet, the fact remains that those reading are more than likely to be a subscriber to multiple dating services. So allow me to do you a service that may or may not help you land a date or a “situationship”.

Since I’m an analogy type of person, I feel the best way to coach dating is to use another activity that goes misunderstood by many. Coincidentally, facts also show that many reading will also be familiar with this activity. Birds, meet large stone. Large stone, meet two confused, misunderstood birds, dating and seeking employment. It seems that the only times these two topics are mentioned in the same breath is when speaking of the pros and cons of dating people at work. Daters pay attention because the journey starts now, and while there are so many examples that I could use, I’ll let you figure out any that I neglect to mention.

Career Employee

So many of my peers tend to think that going to college makes finding that desired career that much easier. Contrary to that belief is that there’s a significant number of people who enter the workforce real early, like as soon as they’re legal early. By the time they’ve entered their thirties, they know the ins and outs of their particular career, and sure they can tell you about what it takes to keep your job, they are probably a useless resource when you’re out here hunting for yourself. These career employees can hook you up with a job in the event you want to get an inside track and skip the job boards. Beware of the ones who hit a crisis and decide to change it up late in life siting the lack of variety in their lives.

Serial Jobbers

These folks never seem to go unemployed for long periods of time, but they don’t seem to have any specific discipline either. Landing a job for them is like finding a lost penny in the couch. You wonder who would be crazy enough to hire them with that work history. In all honesty, these people don’t ask much of potential employers nor to their employers think too highly of them. A lot of these situations may not be ideal, but why does that matter when all parties are content? Serial jobbers may offer some decent job landing tips along with some decent low hanging leads.

The Quick Hook Up

There are times when an employer will sell all the great parts of the job; the compensation, the benefits, the nine. What they don’t tell you is all the bullshit that comes with the job. These employers can get away with this because they have an eye for people who really want be hired. Do they care about turn over? Nope. Why care when you know that you can probably hook someone into a long-term job if they would rather work at a shitty job with some decent perks than go back to the job hunt. Besides, if you keep them busy doing shitty work, they won’t have time to look for side work or a career change.

Seasonal Worker

There are certain job fields (think retail) that have seasonal or habitual peak seasons that require an increase in staffing. On the surface, it seems ideal to seek employment around these time periods. It will surely lead to employment considering that there is a rise in need. The thing is that employers during this time period don’t vet candidates properly if at all leading to lowered expectations of performance. New hires go into these situations over achieving in the hopes of impressing the employer; little do they know that these jobs have nearly no intention of retaining them beyond the seasonal period. Those who go into these seasons with the understanding that they will be back on the unemployment line once it’s all over will keep up her or his sanity. Far too many seasonal employees find themselves heartbroken at the end of the season with a litany of skills that will be in demand until the hiring season rolls around again.

The College Grad

The college grad has all the knowledge in the world and the debt to match. There are grads who luck up and land an executive position, paying internship, or some other lucrative offer that rewards them for their educational success while most end up seeking positions in which they meet the minimum requirements save the relevant work experience. Older grads who opted to take the Quick Hook Up or some other option out of school end up catching it bad too. They may have years of work experience, just not in the studied discipline. These college grads can check off every single box to submit that resume and application only to have the employer look at that work experience field and see nothing but red flags. Many employers will think how is it that a thirty-something year old candidate with a Master’s and other prerequisites not have entered the industry. There must be a reason no one else has hired them.

That’s all you get this go around. There will be more to come so check back for more and see if one of these scenarios match your dating struggles or success. Then again, remember that I’m a gainfully employed man who has learned how to keep his job happy with him and myself happy with my job.